Hello, my name is Glenna, I first just want to start off by saying I hope you will allow me to share my experience with God. I hope you may serve Him or allow Him in your heart. He’s an awesome God to serve.
I remember as a kid growing up I would talk and pray for Him to help my parents. They were both on hard drugs my whole life. I would beg and cry out to God but received no answer (so I thought); my Mom and Dad split up before I can even remember. They never had a good relationship. Neither side of the family liked one another, just dealt with one another. As a young girl my Mom took my siblings and I up to Des Moines, Iowa. We lived there from when I was in preschool until 5th grade. My Mom was working for very bad people up there. Not taking good care of herself or us. But she at least did try very hard to take care of us. Throughout grade school my grandparents paid to fly me out here to Tucson for the summer. That way I could at least try to make a relationship with my father. Which made it hard at times because it was like it was being forced upon us. At that time God was trying to work through me, but I would not allow it because I was so stubborn. I’m very grateful for my grandparents; for all the time, effort and hard work they always put in to mend my relationship with my Dad. They’ve always been great role models in my life.
The first night I prayed with my church family and let God in my heart was September 12, 2010. That was one of the happiest days of my life. You just feel this anguish of pain and worries lifted off your chest and shoulders. You truly feel reborn. Right before I became a Christian, my fiancé Alex and I had just gotten sober, that February. We were addicted to mostly heroin and crack, but would pretty much do anything we could get our hands on. We, like most, have dealt with a lot of painful years as youth. The easiest way for us to not think or dwell on it was to self-medicate by numbing ourselves to the point we would not think at all anymore.
However, the good Lord knew the only way we were going to get sober, was to hit rock bottom first in order for us to realize how serious our addiction truly was. And stop being in denial about it. Nobody wants to believe they have a problem and are truly addicts. Because once an addict, always an addict. No matter how long you have been sober. Or how strong you are in your sobriety. You’re always an addict in recovery. The biggest reason I always really liked opiates/downers was because I was self-medicating for my anxiety/depression. Downers allowed me to stop all of those memories and bad worrisome thoughts and shut it down for at least the time being. But it made the thoughts worse later. The devil is always working and trying to play his tricks on you in any way he can. So I had to allow it to click that no matter what, those thoughts are always going to be there. Things (may) have happened, but that doesn’t mean they will happen again. I had to replace those feelings of wanting to do drugs to cover the pain with a different means of covering it, or calming it down. So becoming a Christian allowed me to pray and bring those thoughts and worries to God. Allowing Him to comfort and guide me. He’s always there whether you think so or not. Having a bad day or a bad week, give it to God, He will and can guide if you will allow Him to.
It’s a miraculous process to go from being drug addicts and drug dealers, who thought they’d never change, to becoming whole-hearted Christians that are now disciples of Christ, who just want to help others and share His blessings with others. We both have a strong passion for wanting to help addicts get the help needed to get clean. Alex and I tried for almost a year to find a place that could help us, finally we found the help we needed. When someone is ready to get clean, and is trying so hard to get the help, and continues hitting nothing but brick walls. That makes it very discouraging to most people. I believe there should be more resources for these young and older adults struggling with sobriety.
Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, puts you in certain places at the right time and around certain people for a reason. Whether it may be a trial or a test. Or maybe He needs your help to do His work. I’m a strong believer in everything happens for a reason. There may be times you want things to happen faster or that we may want more than what we actually have. But what we as humans fail to realize is that it’s on God’s timing not on our own. We might think it’s better for us to have it right now, but only God knows what’s truly best for us.
So please allow yourself to make that big step of faith, and do what’s so hard for most to do. Make a commitment, a commitment to follow Christ. To live a Christ based life and follow what He has planned for you. We all veer off the path that’s provided sometimes. But it’s always possible to get back on track. There are some trials you think that you will never make it through. But we will and we can. All things are possible through Christ. Jesus loves us so much that He died on the cross, not for His sins, but for ours. We are all sinners every single one of us, and we’re in need of a savior. Jesus is that savior. Make the commitment to follow Christ and listen to His plans for us!
Thank you for the time you’ve spent reading my testimony. I hope you have enjoyed listening to my story. If you have any questions or just want to talk, please feel free to get in touch with me.
Sunday, July 15th 2012